There is one word that embodies the spirit of a new year, the excitement of a fresh start, and the hope of the unknown: change.
I have spent many late-Decembers pondering the changes of a new year. For me, 2017 has been a year of many changes; the beginning to the end of my college career, the year I became an aunt, and the year that God solidified a calling on my life to pursue vocational ministry. As graduation quickly approaches, my time at UCF will soon come to a close and like many soon-to-be college grads, I anticipate that next year will be a year of change. Around this time last year, I began to seriously consider what would come after graduation. What does God have for me? Is it good? How am I going to use my college degree to actually make an impact? What will be my story? A little over one month ago, I made a decision that would determine at least part of that story; a two year internship with Reformed University Fellowship.
reformed university fellowship
Reformed University Fellowship (RUF) is a ministry strategically placed on college campuses to minister to college students. This ministry seeks to reach and equip college students with the good news of Jesus and welcomes them to come as they are regardless of beliefs, questions, or doubts. RUF has been many things for many people. For the Christian, it may be an outlet to actually consider what it means to personally walk with Jesus, and be both encouraged and challenged in that walk. For the unbeliever, it may be an opportunity to learn about who Jesus really is, be cared for by His people, witness the beauty of a life with Him, and accept from Him the free gift of salvation. For all, it is a safe place to experience biblical teaching, genuine fellowship, and (most importantly) God's deep, unwavering, eternal love for His image-bearers.
where ruf meets my story
During my time at UCF, I've deeply cherished this ministry and the work God is doing through it. As a high-school senior, I earnestly prayed for Christian community in college. As I was shuffling through the masses of students past UCF's prominent reflection pond during my first week on campus, I encountered the ministry that would change the trajectory of my college career and life. Like a tidal wave of Grace washing over me, God answered my prayer- and so much more. In the years that would follow that providential day by the Reflection Pond, God changed my life in some incredible ways. And although all Glory belongs to Him and Him alone, there is no doubt that God used this ministry as a vessel to accomplish some of His amazing work.
As I began look toward my future as a college graduate, I asked God to fill my heart with His desires for me (a prayer I've prayed many, many times). And in giving me the courage to explore those desires, He led me to apply for and accept an internship with RUF.
i am so excited
I recently woke up one morning with this these words in my head and this feeling in my heart; "I am so excited". It is an excitement that is sure and true. It is an excitement that fills me with gratitude and surrounds me with peace. It's hard to believe that I am going to have the opportunity to serve with the ministry that God used to convince me that I am more sinful&needy, yet more loved&valuable than I could ever imagine.
The ministry God used to give me the conviction and courage to get help overcoming self-destrcutive behavior. The ministry that led me to people who have continuously met me in my brokenness and pointed me to the truth. The ministry where I learned about depth of importance of God's word and His church.
Yes, in so many ways I am thrilled and feel privileged to be a part of this ministry...
...but don't get me wrong- I often find myself battling anxieties, fears, doubts, and worries associated with this decision. I've spent some time weighing the risks and considering sacrifices that lie ahead. A day doesn't pass when I don't ask God questions like: "How am I going to raise the money?", "Can you really use me?", "How am I going to convince people this matters?", "What if I get sent to the wrong place?". The list goes on and on. Though I am not beating myself up over wrestling through these questions, I have to remind myself that they are all rooted in fear. And I serve a God who tells me not to live in fear. So as I walk through this season of unknowns, I will trust in Him. He has gone before me and is with me always- He is faithful.
psalm 37: 3-6
"Trust in the LORD, and do good;dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the LORD,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him, and he will act.
He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday."